National hero.
National hero.

Turnbull’s grandson is all of us today

REPRESENTING the mindset of the Australian people after a ridiculous and exhausting week in Canberra, Malcolm Turnbull's grandson has gone rogue during the outgoing Prime Minister's official press conference.

It has been an intense few days for everyone in this country. And after faffing around forever, it has finally been decided we have a new Prime Minister in Scott Morrison.

We're all fed-up. Everyone deserves takeaway tonight. And the nation's exhaustion has been channelled for all to see by Turnbull's grandson, Jack.

Exhibiting the kind of raw attitude not seen since rock stars like Kurt Cobain smashed guitars in gritty bars, Jack stomped around the podium as his grandad conceded defeat.

Glaring down the lenses of the waiting news cameras, he squinted and scowled. He didn't say anything, but he didn't have to. The message was clear: Don't mess with me.

Eat my shorts.
Eat my shorts.

Adrenaline pumped through his veins and the country's finest political reporters huddled together. Their shock and terror only encouraged him.

Jack's not just a five-year-old who needs a nap. His grandad was the Prime Minister of this whole damn country. He knows things. He's heard all the secrets over Christmas lunch.

‘Grandma says Kirribilli House is a glorified storage unit!’
‘Grandma says Kirribilli House is a glorified storage unit!’

While most other adults would grab their kid by the wrist and threaten to burn all their Coles Little Shop figurines, Malcolm just chortled. He loved it. After all, while he was maintaining his composure, Jack got to do everything he wished he could in that moment.

Eat my shorts.
Eat my shorts.


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