Alan's catfish for the Queen
ALAN Windsor identifies himself as "the regal Windsor" when he is introduced to people - and a surname is not the only thing he shares with Queen Elizabeth, currently visiting Down Under.
Mr Windsor, of Casino, is also a dog lover, though he prefers Staffordshire terriers rather than the royal corgis.
And just as HRH likes a spot of huntin', Mr Windsor enjoys a bit of fishin', and he said he would be happy to invite the Queen to join him on an expedition.
"I wouldn't go down to Sydney to see her - or even into Casino - but if she turned up here I'd ask her in for a cup of tea," he says.
"We could head out to Bentley and catch a few catfish and bring them back. She'd have to skin them, though. At my place everybody's equal.
"I'd fry a couple of fillets, done in egg and crushed Weetbix."
He reckons his royal guest would agree with his assessment that catfish were "the nicest fish you could eat".
"She'd have an experience she wouldn't forget out here."
Mr Windsor, 49, shares a passion with another minor member of royalty - boxing, as favoured by the Marquess of Queensberry
In his spare time he helps out at the Casino RSM youth club, climbing into the ring with the young fellows "to get the crap beaten out of me".
It's a small sacrifice to help the youngsters have a bit of fun, keep fit and grow in confidence, he says.
Fishing and knocking out a few Australian songs on an acoustic guitar help Mr Windsor relax and he feels sympathy for his regal namesake and the pressure she and the family are under.
"A lot of people are too stressed out nowadays," he says.
Like those who get "a bit snotty" when he jokes about his royal connections, though he says most people are pretty good about it.
After his "cousin", the Queen, he says he liked the late Princess of Wales most among the royals.
"I was pretty impressed with Princess Di, for her humanity, getting rid of the mines in Vietnam and other places."
But at heart he is more of a republican than a monarchist.
"I reckon Australia should be independent. We're big enough and ugly enough to look after ourselves. If we can't get it right now there's something wrong."
As a patriot, he plans to get to know his home country a bit better, embarking on a royal tour of his own.
He's bought a Toyota troop carrier and once it isall decked out, the former railways worker is set to hit the road for a five-year odyssey.
"I want to see Australia before I see anywhere else," he says, with a princely flourish.